“ A massive iron key - 2' length, 20 lbs forged with demonic faces from the bones and horns of demon-lords. When used with a massive portal - carefully built according to documents found in powerful books of evil knowledge, it will open into the realm of demons and allow them to flood into the world. The applications of this item for villains are obvious. Mortals touching this item are subject to [Effects_of_Touching_Powerful_Evil_Artifacts]”
“ There is a race of beings that have endless lifespans. Because of their eternal existence, the only forms of time which they understand are being and non-being. They do not understand words or ideas such as past, future, present, yesterday, today, tommorow, then, now, when, until, ect. They do understand yes, no, live, die, on, off, there, not there, existent, non-existent, ect.”